excuses
i’m tired of making excuses for missing out on life. i have migraines. horrible ones. almost every day. last weekend i went to urgent care and twice had an iv put in to get a combination of drugs that made me panicky, sore and vomitous. the first time the nurse accidently removed the iv from my arm, so when i went in the next morning for the second in what was to be 8 to 10 rounds of the cocktail, i had to be refitted with the iv, this time in my hand. the effect, the same as the first, was so awful that i had a friend remove the iv later that night and cancelled the rest of my appointments. i had a migraine the next day. and the next. yesterday, at my desk at work, i cried for the first time in a year. i have 4 prescriptions that are supposed to help, the newest is also prescribed for epileptics. every morning and afternoon i swallow six ounces of foul tasting chinese herbs that are meant to reduce inflammation. all of these supposed remedies cost me roughly $80 every week. luckily, i am saving money by not spending time with my friends. not going to see the new harry potter movie because it will be too loud. not driving my car during the day because the sun is too bright. not living, just having a headache. almost all the time.
i’m not making excuses. i’m just complaining.
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